"til this evening is this morning, life is fine"

I spend a lot of time by myself. A lot. I can't decide if that's selfish. Should I haul my butt of the practice room and spend more time talking to people, maybe even help them every once in awhile in doing so, or keep spending as much time as possible trying to make the most of whatever talent I've been given?

I guess if the talent I have isn't enough, it's pointless to sacrifice my relationships with people by chasing after fantasies. I wish I knew what it will be like after I leave this bubble.

I also guess that whatever gift I have will never be "enough" if I'm judging it by the wrong standard. Whatever that means. I just wish I knew whether or not I'm kidding myself by pursuing this. Growing up sucks. I liked high school. Everyone thought I was the bomb just because I brought my instrument home every now and then.

Just kidding. High school was not the shiznit.

Neither is getting older. The bird flu should take me now while I still have some of my sanity. Hospers basement, here I come.

But really bra, my life doesn't suck. I just like complaining to my blog. NISO was fun today. Sioux City Symphony was fun the other day. Freaking fun. Yesterday I watched Aladdin with some people. The very third movie I've watched since class started, are you guys proud of me?

Ted Neeley is starring in JC Superstar in Sioux City in May. Yes, that's the same Ted Neeley from the movie. Yes, I'm stoked out of my undapants. Yes, I'm going. Unless the bird flu gets me before then. I need to be careful what I wish for.

Going to bed.