I wonder if the person I am actually exists, or if I'm just a reflection of random parts of other people. I miss the feeling of home. I miss the feeling of being happy with myself. I think I left a huge chunk of myself in Orange City and I really don't like what's left. I am PMSing for sure.

What do you think is the point of relationships to begin with? Is it worth it fall in love with people, with places, etc, when inevitably you leave it behind?

I think the best parts of myself are things that I find in other people. Now that everyone is gone I'm left to my own devices, and I'm finding myself selfisher, shallower, duller, more passive than I thought I would be, and I miss the things I like about myself just as much, maybe even more than I miss the people who brought them out in me. Eff.