no direction home

I got up at 8:00 today for apparently no reason. I do not know what to do with myself. I hate that feeling. And I hate my inability to be satisfied with anything I do. I know a lot of things went well yesterday, but all I can think about is how many things went wrong. And now I have no chance to fix them. I couldn't sleep last night. And I never have problems sleeping. Sleeping is my greatest talent.

The pre-recital era of life is over, and on the other side... it seems I'm left with a bunch of classes in which I feel hopelessly behind, a killer dress that I have to give back, and an awkward violin lesson in which I will be coerced into listening to recordings of myself.

I am so unappreciative it's disgusting.

On the up side, I have purchased a chocolate espresso candy bar that has turned out to be the best thing I have ever eaten in my LIFE.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xO0gSJGJ7Fs
I wish real life was like this. If we could all see art like this man does, the world would be a whole lot more beautiful. It's so raw I can hardly stand to watch it.